Why not me?

I am frustrated with my body. I should be finding out this week if we are having a boy or girl, not trying to figure out when my most fertile days are so we can conceive another child. Why does it have to be so hard for me to get and stay pregnant? I thought maybe it was just a fluke with our first m/c before Adia, but now i'm beginning to believe that Adia was a true miracle. So far I'm 1 for 3 on the baby front and I just pray I get to add one to the 1 side soon and not the 3. Then, to top it off, I was really thinking this last week I was pregnant again. I had all the signs, but it ended up being a cruel joke. And of course the day after realize I am not, in fact, knocked up, I learn that my cousin and his wife JUST found out they're expecting. AHHHHH! But I can't be too upset when people get pregnant and I don't, especially first timeers. I have my beautiful daughter who is truly amazing, hilarious and intelligent (yes, she's only 2). I just never thought we would only have 1 child. I've never wanted that. Jason's never wanted that. Yet, it's not really our say. It's God's.